Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Just like that?
Last Friday I took one final test to confirm I wasn't pregnant before I hopped in the car and traveled south to Alabama to drop off Miss Mia and visit with Jillian and Peyton. The test was a BFN so off I went expecting to start on Saturday. Saturday came and went with no sign of AF. On our way home Sunday my mom, aunt and I got to talking about my crazy cycle and what was going on, I decided then I would take my last FRER the following morning.. Much to my surprise Monday morning the test showed a very very very faint line. I called my RE and explained to them that I thought I could be a week late but wasn't sure because of the crazy stair stepping process I had done in November that threw my cycle off, and also that I had a very very faint test! They had me come in right away for blood work, and 3 short hours later they called to confirm that I was in fact pregnant but that my levels were extremely low and that I was more than likely having a bio Chemical pregnancy. The nurse made an appointment for me to return on Wednesday to confirm their theory. Today I started to cramp and spot. So the repeat labs will not be necessary. I just can not believe this is happing? That we conceived on our own, on our off month... Only to have it ripped away yet again. I am assuming that this will not affect our iui for next month and that we can go ahead with our plan. But it's just so hard to accept that 4 times now, I have been pregnant and 4 times now I have not been able to carry that pregnancy to term. It makes me scared for next month, it makes me scared for the future in general..will I ever be able to have a successful pregnancy or will we just keep getting up, to get knocked down? So it's over just like that.. Another pregnancy come and gone.