Monday, April 2, 2012

Another Angel in Heaven

12 weeks 1 day we said goodbye to baby W, I went in to the emergency room on Sunday afternoon with very very little spotting after a failed attempt to find the baby's heartbeat with the Doppler and with the external ultrasound an internal ultrasound was ordered. It was then we discovered that baby w had stopped growing right after my 8 week 6 day ultrasound there was no heartbeat it was one of the worst things expecting parents have to hear. Soon after the decision was made to have a D&C. We were sent home and returned early Monday morning. The procedure went well, they will be doing testing to hopefully give us some answers on what went wrong. We are now at home recovering and grieving. I wouldn't change anything about the way we celebrated this baby and prepared early for this baby. I am so heartbroken that this had to happen I am trying to tell myself over and over that there was something not developing right with the baby and that it happened for a reason, but that doesn't make the pain any easier. I won't be returning to work for a while and I may take a break for blogging while we heal. Please pray for not only our healing, but the healing of our loved ones that this has also affected. I wish everyone the best and will continue to pray for all of you who's journeys I follow.

29 comments:

  1. im so sorry for u Alexis. i wish i could do something to ease your pain. u r in my prayers. i love u dearly. xoxo

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  2. Oh no!! I am so very very sorry. I can not express my hurt for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers!!

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  3. This is so heartbreaking...I'm SO sorry for you and your husband's loss :(

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  4. I'm so so sorry to hear this...it's my own story almost to a T. 12 w1d trip to the ER with spotting and found out baby died somewhere in between 8 and 9 weeks, just a day or two after my ultrasound at 8w3d. My heart is literally breaking for you as I can remember the whole experience vividly. It's gut wrenching and soul sucking and unlike any pain I've ever experienced. Please take all the time you need to grieve and heal. We will all be here for you when you get back. And please please please feel no obligation to follow any of our blogs or our journeys, I'm sure we'd all completely understand if you just delete any and all pregnancy related blogs from your blogroll. I tried a few times to continue to follow some bloggers through their pregnancies and let me tell you, it isn't worth it! Found myself in a ball of tears every time. Think of yourself first. My heart goes out to you and your husband as you attempt to deal with and heal after this most devastating loss.

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  5. Oh, Alexis, my heart hurt just to read the title of this post. I am so, so sorry. I cannot think of a more undeserving couple. Please know that I am keeping you, your husband and your little angel in my thoughts and prayers. Sending so much love your way. Xoxoxo

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  6. alexis, i am in tears. i am beyond sorry for your loss. i'm with julia above...as soon as i read the title, i screamed, "NO!" and the tears started streaming. i wish i could express to you how very sorry i am...in more than just this comment. please know that you are going always remain in my thoughts and prayers.
    not only you and scott, and your precious baby, but your family and your wonderful mother will also strongly be in my prayers.
    you are a strong and beautiful woman and i know that all the amazing love in your life with help carry you through this. feel whatever you need to feel always, and know that you have a ton of us rooting for you. <3
    so much love to you and your family!!
    XOXOXO
    maria

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  7. Oh, Alexis. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself, love.

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  8. I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you and your family.

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  9. Came here via Jesica's blog. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending love...

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  10. I'm so so sorry about this. It is so heartbreaking. Sending a prayer for you, Scott and your families. I hope you can get some answers as well.

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  11. I am so very sorry to hear the news. It's absolutely heartbreaking and I hate that you have to experience this loss. After working so hard to get where you were its terrible to have it all taken away. Take time for you and your husband to be together and grieve. Hugs to you both.

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  12. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. My heart goes out to you and your husband. There are no words that will make things better, but I promise with time you will heal. We lost our first little one at a few days short of 12 weeks as well. It took months before I was back to myself and honestly I don't think I'll ever be the same person I was before the loss (in a good way). If there is anything you need, even if just to talk please know that I'm here.

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  13. Alexis, my heart hurts for you and your family. I pray God brings you all through this. He has a plan for you that only he knows. I can only pray you heal soon. Take Care

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  14. Oh sweet Alexis! I am so so sorry for you and your husband! I will definitely be praying that the Lord will bring you comfort during this heartbreaking time :( I know you will be able to hold your sweet baby in your arms one day!

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  15. My heart goes out to you and your family right now. I can't even imagine the pain you are feeling and I am so sorry that you have to. Will be sending hugs and prayers your way.

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  16. omg, I don't even know what to say. I know from experience that nothing anyone says right now will ease the pain... My heart is breaking for you and I am in tears... I'm just so deeply sorry this has happened to you. I know that pain that is filling your heart right now and I am so sad that you have suffered this loss. I will be praying for you over the coming days, weeks, and months. I'm 5 months post miscarriage this week, and there are still days where I shed tears. Take as much time as you need from blogging, (((((hugs)))))

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  17. O my goodness :( I am soo soo soo sorry to hear about your loss :( words could never make it any easier but I will definitely keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  18. omgosh! I am sooo sorry!! sending big ((HUGS)) and prayers your way.

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  19. I'm so sorry. I'll be thinking of you.

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  20. I am so sorry. I know you were so excited for this baby, it just isn't fair. Sending thoughts and prayers your way. ((hugs))

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  21. I am so sorry to hear about your loss, and will be praying for you and your family as you deal with all the emotions that come with it.

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  22. I am so sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers are being sent your way during this time...

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  23. I'm so sorry for your loss, I'll be praying for you and your family.

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  24. I am so, so sorry for your loss.

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  25. I read about your loss on Just Blog and Smile. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss.

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  26. Here from another blog to offer some support during this painful time. I lost twins at 20 weeks and know all too well the heartache in the waiting, failures, and loss. No person should ever have to go through this, let alone more than once. My one loss was enough for a lifetime and I am afraid to keep moving forward. But we do. You will too.
    Please know that there are dozens of women out there thinking of you and praying for your lost baby. My thoughts are filled with peace and hope for you and your future.
    Alissa
    http://missconception-ads.blogspot.com/

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  27. Oh Alexis, my heart is absolutely breaking for you. I was totally shocked and stunned to read this post. I really don't know what to say, as I have not been through what you are going through (though I can only imagine the terrible pain of this loss), but please know that I am sending strengthening thoughts and love over the oceans from Australia to you. xxx

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  28. I just read about your loss. I'm so sorry. My heart is broken for you! Sending prayers and positive thoughts your way!

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  29. where have i been?! I am so very sorry, sweet lady. you hang in there! I was just reading your newest post and my heart dropped cause I knew you were expecting so I had to find out what had happened so I scrolled all the way to this post. I know you hear this a lot and mucst be frustrating, but everything happens for a reason. Ill be praying for you guys!! sending lots of love your way!! BLESSINGS!

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