Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Silly Me...

I read my last post and laughed. 
The hope I always hold month after month..
Ohhhh Ahhh EWCM this will be the month!
So stupid. 
I'm in a weird place right now. 
I'm in limbo, 
I was set and ready to start IVF in March
I have talked with the Nurses and the plan is a go. 
But now I'm second guessing my choices. 
I hate this office. 
I just took a minute to read back 
through my blog and turns out I've hated them 
since 2012...Its 2015...
what the hell is wrong with me?
Why have I stuck around so long?
I know why. It's because I'm fearful 
of starting over with a new RE.. 
I HATE going to new doctors..
I HATE going over every shitty situation that has 
occurred in the last 5 year...
I just don't want to do it. 
But on the other hand. I want a baby. 
I want to make my husband a father 
and my parents and in laws grandparents...
I tell myself it comes down to how 
bad do you want it. 

I posted a long post on my TTC_Babywarrick IG account
you are welcome to read... 
But to sum it up. 
I am going to see my OB on moday..
I trust him, 
I am comfortable with him. 
and after my last miscarriage he promised to 
help me in any way he could. 
I value his opinion..
and in my opinion he helped me get pregnant 
this last time..after 6 short months of seeing him...
Dr. B on the other hand...
3 years...a million ultrasounds,
3 IUI's injections and so on 
and nothing...not one single BFP..
That has to speak volumes..
and now im ready to listen.
I will update after my appointment Monday 
if there is anyone out there that still reads this..
and you're the praying type send one up for us.. 


  1. Goodluck on ur appointment on Monday! Hope everything goes well. Sending lots of good vibes and prayers ur way.

  2. Good luck on your appointment! Will pray for you :)

  3. We have been praying for you and we won't stop! It just doesn't make sense right now, but I pray that it will all make sense sometime soon. May your appointment go well and you get some good information. PRAYERS!

  4. Good luck Monday! I never left my OB/GYN when I was trying, he was the fertility specialist for my clinic and I stuck with everything he said we needed to do. Hopefully yours will be as awesome :)

  5. Do you have another RE in your area? If you hate your current one then maybe you could find a different RE? There are special OB/GYNs that are well versed in infertility issues, but then there are far too many that give horrible advice and don't know what they are talking about.